Henri Nouwen: Masculine and Feminine God

You have to keep searching for your body's deeper need, the need for genuine love. Every time you are able to go beyond the body's superficial desires for love, you are bringing your body home and moving toward integration and unity.” -Henri Nouwen, The Return of the Prodigal Son

Masculine and Feminine God
"Often I have asked friends to give me their first impression of Rembrandt's Prodigal Son. Inevitably, they point to the wise old man who forgives his son: the benevolent patriarch.

"The longer I look at 'the patriarch', the clearer it becomes to me that Rembrandt has done something quite different from letting God pose as the wise old head of a family. It all began with the hands. The two are quite different. The father's left hand touching the son's shoulder is strong and muscular. The fingers are spread out and cover a large part of the prodigal son's shoulder and back. I can see a certain pressure, especially in the thumb. That hand seems not only to touch, but, with its strength, also to hold. Even though there is a gentleness in the way the father's left hand touches his son, it is not without a firm grip.
"How different is the father's right hand! This hand does not hold or grasp. It is refined, soft, and very tender. The fingers are close to each other and they have an elegant quality. It lies gently upon the son's shoulder. It wants to caress, to stroke, and to offer consolation and comfort. It is a mother's hand....'
"As soon as I recognized the difference between the two hands of the father, a new world of meaning opened up for me. The Father is not simply a great patriarch. He is mother as well as father. He touches the son with a masculine hand and a feminine hand. He holds, and she caresses. He confirms and she consoles. He is, indeed, God, in whom both manhood and womanhood, fatherhood and motherhood, are fully present.'

'That gentle and caressing right hand echoes for me the words of the biblical prophet Isaiah, "Can a woman forget her baby at the breast, feel no pity for the child she has borne? Even if these were to forget, I shall not forget you. Look, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands."
Also Nouwen writes: “Your body needs to be held and to hold, to be touched and to touch. None of these needs is to be despised, denied, or repressed. But you have to keep searching for your body's deeper need, the need for genuine love. Every time you are able to go beyond the body's superficial desires for love, you are bringing your body home and moving toward integration and unity.”

excerpted from Henri Nouwen, The Return of the Prodigal Son

In Return of the Prodigal Son, Nouwen describes love and forgiveness as unconditional. Though this is not a new idea, Nouwen's thought is arguably unique as he approached this theme from the view of the younger son, the elder son, and the father.
Each captures the unconditional quality of love and forgiveness in their own way. The younger son's life shows how the beloved lives a life of misery by thinking he can be loved only by meeting certain qualifications of the lover which he fails to meet.
The elder son's actions shows how the beloved can be depressed because he thinks he should receive greater love because he has done all the right things, or that he has met these qualifications.
The father alone understands how to love and forgive and is able to do so, and be happy. Nouwen explains that we are the younger son at times; when we think we don't deserve the love or the forgiveness, and the elder son at times; when we think we deserve love, or that another doesn't deserve it more than us-- that we are all called to be like the father; that by being like the father, we can come closer to being loved as the beloved.

About Henri Nouwen

Henri Nouwen (1932-1996) is a 20th century Christian writer, poet, teacher and mystic. He lived both in the Netherlands and in the United States. His books are now read in many languages around the world.