She Protests Too Much

"thou doth protest too much."  --William Shakespeare

Some women who call themselves "feminists" may really feel deeply the opposite, as in "thou doth protest too much." William Shakespeare wrote this line more than five centuries ago, a prescient insight into human nature.
 More recently, Thomas Moore in his book, the Soul's Religion, takes up the topic of femininity writing that "in a deep corner of their soul, [they] rejected women and didn't really appreciate the value of feminine qualities." 
While perhaps trite to say, Moore observes that behavior is a double edge sword, or sides of a coin, the flip side is naturally its opposite. Is that hard to understand?

He further writes that the women with whom he discussed this contradiction within themselves have much courage to explore this embarrassing discovery about their deepest feelings and values. Contrasting with  women, there are also men whom Moore writes, are caught by the same or similar notions dishonoring women, "the mother goddess" as he calls it. They are excessive in their devotions towards women; an unbalanced adoration that puts off real, flesh and blood women. Here the Avatar of the goddess is confused for the goddess herself.
 In these men there often are signs of this imbalance: sudden anger and resentments, even violence towards women in a generalized sense. paraphrased

The feminine energy in life doesn't disappear as a result of this hostility directed towards herself. Rather she may be pushed just beneath the surface where her energy lurks, often making life and relationships impossible. The candle is extinguished; in her neglected state, she is oppressed and unexpressed; while some choose to engage in the traditional helping professions, this gives only temporary outlet.
 Pushing through barriers erected just for her suppression, so as to have a clean, tidy, daily existence, the spiritual nature of the mother goddess soon rushes forward. She will have none of that! The retort of which is a fierce tongue lashing, a warring heart and an excess passion for the physical pursuits of the world.

Working herself free of blockages is to restore the balance of energy that is natural to the soul. More than just talking about these lacks as correction, we must take concrete action in a direct, soulful, spiritual way to gain the balance that we need. 
We must not become lost in addictions either to drugs or behaviors for they are no good substitute for the spiritual ecstasy that we may really be seeking, or the holiness found in religion because all human problems are spiritual problems, insists Moore.

Feminists, Unsettled Lives

"Then all of them together, crying loudly, moved to the malevolent shore that awaits anyone who has no fear of God." -- Inferno, Canto III by Dante

In his belief, born of experience first as a cloistered monk and then as a Jungian therapist, Thomas Moore comes now to realize that "what was really at the root of those unsettled lives was religion... I didn't always realize the extent to which spiritual issues were playing a central role... The obvious spiritual problems had to do with disturbing experiences surrounding religion in childhood." In his book, The Soul's Religion, Moore writes "in these ordinary, troubled lives, spirit and psyche were closely connected. In other cases, spiritual issues were more subtle and required a broadening of the idea of spirituality."

Today, society to the extent that it acknowledges religion at all, sees itself "in relation to an image of a "gentleman God," the grandfather and patriarch." This pushes the feminine into the shadows, hidden beneath the surface of everyday life. Neglected feminine nature in the world is often felt in oppressive and mysterious forces that may make living an everyday life almost impossible. For the feminine energy, as her balance, masculine energy needs recognition for composure in daily living. Many today neglect, even deny the feminine nature; they are hostile to its alleged weak frailty. Yet many seek its compensations in a professional life that includes care-taking in fields like nursing, elementary school teaching, social work; merely doing this everyday, external work doesn't solve an interior, spiritual lack or need for the feminine energy. There are, Moore notes, countless females who mother and nurture all those they contact almost to death. We often seek to escape them. Allowing the feminine, the Marian, into daily life as a spiritual role or guide "is an effective way to heal" the lack of a divine mother in a man or woman's life. She takes her proper place as an 'avatar' rather than a lived out female image. Here, she is spirit; she is soul.

"In matters of soul and spirit, things are not always what they might seem." Moore observes, "I have come to understand sexism and violence against women as a spiritual issue, as a failure to appreciate the feminine mysteries" which no amount of nudity, ogling, looking or voyeuristic regard will alleviate. The deepest interior, which cannot be seen, can only be sensed when the soul-heart is at issue. "Today many spiritual passions are disguised in politics, war, money, sex or athletics." Even so, most secular, enlightenment outlets for spiritual passion are inadequate because they address merely a surface issue, meaning that recognition is admitted only indirectly, often unconsciously, so we don't often even grant that they are religious. These modern, secular, indirect forms "siphon off spiritual steam, leaving unsatisfied religious needs."

This loss of recognition of the spiritual, the religious, as an attitude, a way of life, a lifestyle, leads to great degrees of loss, of illness, of alienation in modern life. Some have written of the "sick soul." Many relationships, families and marriages fail "because we now treat them as sociological constructions or psychological arrangements, partnerships, rather than as holy mysteries. As a result we continue to crave religion of the deepest kind, often in disguised form; yet so much of what we try is inadequate, "only increasing the craving and emptiness" of our deepest selves, writes Moore.

In maturity, spiritual growth, like growth in any other area of our life, renders to us a "quest and search." What we discover is a deepening and a broadening of our self; we are not obliged to a single path, our perceptions deepen, wisdom accrues. We often discover paradoxes at work. How to combine apparent opposites into one coherent, whole is our challenge and our grace. In doing so, we find the gifts of our life.