No Two Buddhas For Parents

"Religious practice is about atonement." --Nothing Special by Charlotte Joko Beck

Charlotte Joko Beck writes in her book, Nothing Special, Living Zen, "I listen to many people talk about their lives, I am struck that the first layer we encounter in sitting practice is our feeling of being a victim--our feeling that we have been sacrificed to others' greed, anger, and ignorance, to their lack of knowledge of who they are. '

"Often this victimization comes from our parents. Nobody has two Buddhas for parents. Instead of Buddhas, we have parents for parents: flawed, confused, angry, self-centered--like all of us..." If, in practice, we grow more in awareness of having been sacrificed, we become angry, upset, confused. We feel hurt that we have been used, mistreated, like this by our loved ones...

Firstly to simply become aware of the feeling, the sensations in our body arising in this instance; secondly, we can grow into working with those feelings that have come to the forefront of our awareness, our anger, desire to get even, our feeling of hurting those who have hurt us in like fashion... We can fight back, but there are other avenues we may choose instead, reflecting back a growing awareness of victimization.

Practicing with this perception, we may experience powerful desires, anger, retribution, confusion, withdrawal or coldness. If we continue to ask, "what is this?" something, however painful it first seems, begins to arise into our consciousness. "We begin to see not only how we have been sacrificed, but also how we have sacrificed others. This can be even more painful than our first realization."

It may occur to us that what we have been doing to others, sacrifice, was done to us--especially when we act upon our angry thoughts and try to get even. We then sacrifice others. "As the Bible says, the evil is visited upon generation after generation."

When regrets and sorrows become great, they're a heavy burden to carry, a realization that what we have done, is what others have done before us, comes a desire to lighten the load, for salvation may arise within us. If we are "committed to healing, we want to atone..." To atone means to be at one, to be in harmony, to make amends. Unable to wipe out the past--we've already committed the deed, we must look to this present moment, to this time now.

In atonement, we embark upon a lifelong process, as did the central character of the recent film of the same name, Atonement. Out of our self centered spinning, we learn to focus on the now, others around us, reality as it is. We, as humans, will not ever hope to entirely stop sacrificing others or ourselves; we are not too perfect to realize that. But what we do hope to realize is that we can, and do grow in maturity and recognition of those places and situations which inspire our impulses. Such so that it becomes much more important that we recognize not what has been done to us, but what we do to others. There is, as theologian Martin Buber wrote, "the I-thou relationship."

"Someone must be the first to break the chain in relationships with our friends and intimates."

What does "this have to do with enlightenment and oneness?"
An enlightened person will be the one willing to be the sacrifice, to break the chain. The willingness to become the sacrifice is basic. Practicing through our lives, growing in awareness, in maturity, we get a free choice, or free will, about what we're going to do.

Even if it's about people with whom we are no longer in co-union (communion). Anger arises, a sinking feeling in the stomach, perhaps. Do they, or we for that matter, need a sacrifice?

Is there some lightness drawing the sense of action forward? What are our intentions? Examine intention carefully, and do not absolutely avoid people who have brought up this anger in you. Are you measuring yourself? Is there a fantasy playing in your mind the moment the person comes into view?

What is necessary in the situation?

Be the best you can be in that moment. Focus upon the necessary and do that. You have that ability to see and use for your own benefit and that of others.

Rosh Ha-Shanah, New Year

In recognition of the recent conclusion of the Jewish New Year 5771 observances, Rosh Ha-Shanah, and the High Holy days occurring annually about September each year, the Simple Mind revisits a most beautiful piece of literature contained within the Jewish Cannon, Sh'ir Ha-sh'irim also known as the Song of Songs or the Song of Solomon. Each new year is commenced by days of reflection, alms giving and repentance. The observance of Rosh Ha-Shanah, itself is also a reflective time for believers. As a covenental faith, Judiaism proclaims a just and merciful G-d, a passionate, loving G-d as reflected in the 'Song.'

"The author of the Song, using the same literary figure, paints a beautiful picture of the ideal Israel, the chosen people of the Old and New Testaments, whom the Lord led by degrees to an exalted spiritual union with himself in the bond of perfect love. When the Song is thus interpreted, there is no reason for surprise at the tone of the poem which employs in its descriptions the courtship and marriage customs of the author's time. Moreover, the poem is not an allegory in which each remark, in the dialogue of the lovers, has a higher meaning. It is a parable in which the true meaning of mutual love comes from the poem as a whole."

"Although the poem is attributed to Solomon in the traditional title, the language and style of the work, among other considerations, point to a time after the end of the Babylonian Exile, 538 B.C as that in which an unknown poet composed this masterpiece. The structure of the Song is difficult to analyze; it is regarded as a lyric dialogue, with dramatic movement and interest. The Lord speaks of Israel as a new spiritual people, purified by the Babylonian captivity and betrothed anew to her divine Lover "in justice and uprightness, in love and mercy."
Quoted text source: various authors, USCCB.

Song of Songs, Sh'ir Ha-Sh'irim, Chapter 2

    I am a flower of Sharon,
    a lily of the valley.
     As a lily among thorns,
    so is my beloved among women.

     As an apple tree among the trees of the woods,
    so is my lover among men.
    I delight to rest in his shadow,
    and his fruit is sweet to my mouth.

      He brings me into the banquet hall
    and his emblem over me is love.

    Strengthen me with raisin cakes,
    refresh me with apples,
    for I am faint with love.

    His left hand is under my head
    and his right arm embraces me.

    I adjure you, daughters of Jerusalem,
    by the gazelles and hinds of the field,
    Do not arouse, do not stir up love
    before its own time.
     Hark! my lover-here he comes
    springing across the mountains,
    leaping across the hills.

    My lover is like a gazelle
    or a young stag.
    Here he stands behind our wall,
    gazing through the windows,
    peering through the lattices.

    My lover speaks; he says to me,
    "Arise, my beloved, my beautiful one,
    and come!
    "For see, the winter is past,
    the rains are over and gone.

    The flowers appear on the earth,
    the time of pruning the vines has come,
    and the song of the dove is heard in our land.

    The fig tree puts forth its figs,
    and the vines, in bloom, give forth fragrance.
    Arise, my beloved, my beautiful one,
    and come!
    "O my dove in the clefts of the rock,
    in the secret recesses of the cliff,
    Let me see you,
    let me hear your voice,
    For your voice is sweet,
    and you are lovely."

Translation: New American Bible